I'm a big believer in lists. I love organization and making things simple and functional. Those type things make me so happy and content, so this is confession time for me:
Right now my life is anything but clean, organized, simple, and functional. Everything is kind of a mush pot and I feel like I'm living such a frenetic existence.
I'm only complaining a little bit and only because it is so hard for someone with my personality to accept that. I know that I am so unbelievably lucky to be doing what I love and that it is supporting me and the children. It's amazing really. I'm going to be extremely straight forward though, sometimes it is still so hard. You learn the hard way that sometimes people will mistreat you, you learn that the schedules you thought would work out just don't, you learn that you have to stay in constant motion to keep it all going.
Sometimes I get down on myself about things. Things like not keeping up with the blog like I "should", not posting as much on Pinterest or on my business Facebook page, or being slow to return calls and emails sometimes. I let myself feel so bad that I'm lagging behind or that things just aren't going as smoothly as I anticipated.
But then I sit back and let myself remember…I'm doing this alone. I do every bit of the work myself, I write every blog I manage post, I source fabrics, I place the orders, I sew everything, I strip all of the upholstery, I do all the new upholstery, I strip the finishes off the furniture, I do the staining, lacquering, or painting and sealing, I use the table saw, the miter saw, the sanders.
(fabric scheme laid out in my living room chair)
(completely packed garage)
On top of all of that, I am the only one that does the laundry, cooking, dishes, cleaning, lawn mowing, taking the children to school and picking them up again. Taking my daughter to dance and still somehow making time for friends occasionally and even dating.
I should really give myself more credit.
(occasionally the children will help with the laundry)
(almost clean living room)
(the little tree I trimmed myself and am ridiculously proud of)
I'm saying this because I had a moment this past week when I couldn't walk through my house. There was a pathway between client furniture and kid mess and I really thought I was going to lose my mind. I thought, "How in the world are you ever going to make your dreams happen when this is what it takes day in and day out?"
It got me thinking that I have only ever thought about my true dreams for Peacock Door Designs. I'm a big believer in writing down goals so here it is -
I want to own a design boutique. I want a place that will be workshop space for custom upholstery, furniture refinishing, and have a small retail space open to the public. I even know exactly where I want it and the building I want to buy.
Right now that still seems pretty far off, but I am still clinging to it. I'm still in the learning curve of my business right now, learning how to juggle it all, making mistakes and overbooking. It happens and I need to be better at forgiving myself for that. Some days my affirmation is just simply "I'm still making it work."
(the day I was in tears because I couldn't walk through my house and I had so much housework I couldn't see the end)
So if you're a small business owner and you are feeling overwhelmed, just know that others feel that way as well. If you're a single parent barely keeping your head above the water, I completely get it. If you are just someone that generally feels overwhelmed by things happening in your life, I'm there with you. Just remember to give yourself a little bit of grace.
I'm so grateful and feel blessed by all that has occurred in my life. It's not always easy, there are tears as well as laughter. There are failures as well as amazing accomplishments and successes.
A verse that helps me through things a lot is Philippians 4:13
"I can do everything through Him who gives me strength."
It's so important to keep reminding myself of this. The struggle is real, but never forget to choose happy!
"It's supposed to be hard. If it wasn't hard everyone would do it. The hard is what makes it great."
- Tom Hanks, A League of Their Own
